Machine Was Brok: The Melancholy Of My Mom -washing

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Josh Johnson 24min read 13 Feb 2024

That exhale was the sound of the melancholy.

She wasn’t just washing clothes. She was mourning. She was mourning the five minutes it used to take to start a load. She was mourning the small luxury of walking away while a machine did the thinking. She was mourning a version of herself who had time—time to sit, time to drink tea, time to not be a servant to stains and sweat. On the fourth day, my father called a repairman. An old man named Mr. Velasco arrived with a leather pouch of tools and the weary optimism of someone who has seen a million machines die. He opened the back panel, peered inside, and clicked his tongue.

My mom worked a full-time job at a tax office. She made dinner every night. She packed lunches. She helped with homework. And in the cracks between all that, she kept us clean. The washing machine was her third hand. Without it, she had to grow a fourth, a fifth, a sixth.

So yes. The washing machine was brok.

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